Saturday, 14 September 2013

Growing pains

‘I want to buy a car mum’
‘Why? You don’t have job so can’t afford to run one’
‘I’ll get a job’
‘But that might take ages’.
‘Oh well, I still want one.

Comes home with a car.

‘Now what Luke?’
‘You could lend me the money for insurance’
‘No, you’re old enough to buy a car, you’re old enough to run it.  Go and get a job’
‘Ok, I will’

Stands back and watches events unfold...

A week of waiting after the mammoth B&Q interview slash team building slash practical exam and Luke is finally put out of his misery – he was not offered a job. Gutted doesn’t even cut how Luke looks. His face is etched into a painful disappointment, somewhere verging on tears. As for how he sounds, I don’t know as he can’t utter a syllable, such is this tortured setback.  The job would have meant independence and cash in his pocket, it would have enabled him to get his beloved car on the road and it would have been success for him.  In his view, it would have been the best thing that has ever happened to him.  He has low esteem and confidence so when he does well at something it boosts him. But if things don’t go as planned then we see a fatal pessimistic attitude from him – he firmly believes that the world is against him and that he has ‘bad luck’.

Seeing my son so disappointed, so cross with himself, so sad and negative absolutely tears me apart. But here’s the bitch: I could change his life and put the biggest smile on his face with just one phone call to the insurance company and the boy would be on the road instantly. I could cheer that kid up and make his day. I could be the hero.

But I’m not going to. Instead, I’m going to keep my bank card tucked firmly away in my purse. I’m going to teach my son a lesson in patience, hard work and appreciation. Despite what he’s learnt from, well, let’s just say ‘another household’ we are each responsible for our own luck and here is where Luke starts realising it.

I have said that I’d do anything for my kids. But shell out cash to put smiles on faces, well no, I won’t do that. 

This quote is going on the fridge door immediately 

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